My Story- How I became the Best Driver in all of Utah

            So apparently in Utah, street racing is a class B misdemeanor with a $2000 penalty. That’s in addition to the actual speeding ticket, which in itself is a class c misdemeanor with a penalty of $750.

            These were the charges I found myself facing as I saw in the Utah Country Civil Court last December.            

            I’ve always had a bit of a problem with speeding. I just listen to my jams as loud as possible and get so pumped up and excited that before I know it, I’ve got the gas pedal floored and my windows rolled down and am singing along with my music as I race down the street. I was a notoriously bad driver among my people. I didn’t even know how to turn the cruise control in my car ON until a few months ago.

            On evening when the deed was done, I topped of at 125, and luckily wasn’t clocked until I started to slow down. 105. Not too bad.

            Now was I street racing..? Usually when I tell this story, I like to make it sound like I was, because being a street racer automatically raises your street cred like 5000%.

Like “hey yeah the cops caught me with my marijuana and now I’m facing all these fines.” “Ah man, I know what you mean. I was in court a few months ago for street racing, and ah, dat legal system am I right?”

            And they’re all like, “hey Anna’s one of us.”

            But I’m being honest with you, I was just driving really fast. Don’t know why the cop charged me with the other things.

            But yeah, there’s the back story, pulled over, he yelled at me a little bit, threatened to arrest me and impound the car, and then gave me my ticket and sent me on my way.

            When I looked up the charges to prepare for my mandatory court date, I was shocked to learn that not only was I facing a $2750 penalty, I was facing things like the revoking of my license, mandatory 24 hours in jail, and crazy insurance stuff.

            That freaked me out. I had 4 weeks until my court date, and in that time I went crazy studying Utah traffic law. A traffic lawyer is like $500, and I make minimum wage. So, being the debate president and I, I figured I could just talk my way out of the ticket if I knew enough about the legal system. So I absorbed every part of the traffic laws surrounding Title 41 Chapter 6a  Part 6  Section 606, Utah exhibition of speed.

            The court date rolled up. Getting ready that morning was a very strategic part of the game. If I showed up like, this, (mangy, rebel) the judge gonna be all like, “dang, that kid’s a rebel, gotta whip them into shape.” So I wore black jeans, a light pink blouse, a black blazer, and pulled my hair back into a neat bun with little pearl earrings. Anything to give the aurora of sweet, intellectual, feminine innocence.

            And the moment I walked into the building, I knew I had made the right choice with my clothing. All the people that were also going to court that day were all ripped jeans, leather jacket, an ‘F the police shift’ and surprisingly, had a very prominent smell of marijuana. I don’t know who thinks it’s a good idea to smoke weed before court. Apparently everyone there.  

            I had everything planned out. They called me up, read my charges, and I plead not guilty. I rescheduled a court date to come back and negotiate my charges.

            I came back a week later with the same air of professional, feminine, humbled. I was ushered in to a room where I sat alone with a nice lady from the state department to discuss the ground of my charges. I smiled and shook her hand and turned on the charm.

            I was, very sorry for the inappropriate and risky behavior I had exhibited on the road and could not believe that I put my friend’s lives in danger.

            -here it is important to note, that even though I beefed it up big time in court, I really did feel bad. Speeding is stupid, especially that fast.

            BUT- after a long discussion, she decided to drop my street racing charge, and lower my speeding ticket my 3 brackets.

            I met with the judge, plead guilty to the speeding, and walked away with a $300 ticket.

OH- but it’s not over there. A few weeks later, I found out that I also walked away with 75 points on my driving record, enough to get my license taken away. So I had the opportunity to meet with state public safety office, who put me on probation.

            Probation means that I can still drive, but if I get another ticket, even for something as little as 1 mph over the limit, I lose my license.

TO THIS DAY, I have my probation papers stuck on my dashboard, sticking up right where they are always in my vision when I drive. That, combined with the fact that as of 3 weeks ago, I no longer has a physical copy of my driver’s license, means that I am THE SAFTEST driver you will ever ride with.

Yellow light, can maybe make it? STOPS.

Back road, can probably go how fast you want? CUISE CONTROL THE SPEED LIMIT

I am not the crazy person I once was. And I almost feel bad about how easily the legal system took me down.